25 août 2009
Little habit
"Nasty little habit?" We are true drug addicts in every sense! That’s right, look in the mirror
and you'll see an honest to goodness drug addict looking right back.
This is one of the most harmful rationalizations of all as it minimizes the risk of using
nicotine products in the minds of our children. While it clearly takes time and repetition to establish a habit, research suggests that “experimenting” with smoking nicotine just once
may be sufficient to begin fostering a loss of the autonomy to stop using it.
Adoption of the “habit” rationalization is also disabling to those already enslaved. Instead
of learning and living on the right side of the “Law of Addiction,” we reside in a pretend
world where some day we’ll awaken and at last discover how to control, mold, modify or
manipulate our nicotine use, so as to allow us to use or not use nicotine as often as we
please. At last we’ll discover how to have our cake and eat it too, ” or so we dream.
The phrase "nasty little habit" is just more junkie thinking. Such soft fuzzy words are used
to self minimize the hard cold reality of being chemically married to and dependent upon
nicotine. It’s much easier to tell yourself that all you have is some "nasty little habit." The
warmth of the phrase is akin to that found in the word "slip," a means to sugarcoat relapse
and failure.
Failing to use turn signals while driving is a "nasty little habit" and so is using too many
cuss words, cracking our knuckles or maybe even losing our temper too often.
But, we will not experience physical withdrawal symptoms if we start using turn signals, stop using cuss words, stop cracking our knuckles or when we learn to keep our temper in check. Chemical addiction does foster habits but it does so by forcing each of us to select patterns for the regular delivery of our addictive drug. Our addiction fathers our drug feeding habits, not the other way around. We would never develop a habit of sucking smoke into our lungs while talking on the telephone or after a meal unless the consequences of constantly falling reserves compelled us to do so. Nicotine dependency is extremely dependable. Our blood-serum nicotine level always declines by roughly half if we fail to replenish within two hours. We can depend upon our mind to begin issuing subtle urges to remind us that it is time to bring more nicotine into our body. Calling nicotine addiction a habit is like calling a young child a parent. It didn't take any two hours for my mind to generate the anxieties needed to compel me to smoke more.
At three packs-a-day, if I was on the phone and had not filled my nicotine tank in the past 15 to 20 minutes, then, like call waiting, a second message from my brain’s insula arrived, reminding me of my need to feed. Even food refueling would take a backseat to nicotine replenishment if the meal lasted much longer than 30 minutes. It limited uninterrupted driving time, romance, learning, exercise (if you can call it that), work, living and nearly every aspect of my life. Yes, it was almost always nearing time for another fix. Yes, I developed habits but not just for the sake of having habits. There were only two choices - smoke more nicotine or prepare for withdrawal. I wish it were just a "nasty little habit," I truly do. But, truth is, my name is John and I’m a recovered nicotine addict. Comfortably, I live just one puff away from three packs a day.